Loof Lirpa Lerts

I don’t usually post on the weekends and the first of
April happens to arrive tomorrow (sometimes referred to as
Loof Lirpa Day – ed.). So, I’ve decided to post some things
that would otherwise have been posted then.

MS Ships Vista, Says You Can Buy It
Now!

In what is seen as a stunning turn around, Microsoft
announced today the immediate availability of its next
generation operating system: Windows Vista. When asked for
comment, MS’s co-president of Platforms and Services Division

Jim Allchin
, stated it had all been a big misunderstanding. It seems
they had accidently saved an older release candidate as their
proposed gold code and deleted the actual gold code. Once
they realized they had already fixed the bugs they were
working on, it became a simple task of finding the original
code and releasing it.

Apple Changes Direction, Says Goodbye to
Intel and Hello to AMD

During an unannounced appearance and speech at the Wil
Wheaton/Doc Searls/Linus Torvald book signing today, Apple
and Pixar CEO Steve
Jobs
hinted that all was not well with the new Intel powered
Macs. It seem his Highness was not getting sufficient credit
from Intel for his daring and superlative break from the
PowerPC platform. Thus, his Greatness decided to switch to
the long rumored AMD X3 10,000+ Tri-Core processors and would
complete the shift by Q2 of next year.

Lenovo Chops Suey

Lenovo image.
In a follow up to an earlier bulletin about the US
investigation of Lenovo’s so called “spyware” laptops from
China, we have obtained the following leaked image from deep
within Lenovo’s secret chip plant in Ooohlongdong province in
the southern tip of China. The extremely high magnification
image appears to be of a section of the CPU that deals with
reproductive functions but analysts are unsure as to its
specific use.

When pressed for a comment, Lenovo spokesperson Outout U
Deminz said only it was “pure stupidity.” It is unclear where
this newly created substance (i.e, pure stupidity) is on the
atomic scale of elements but is said to have been first
developed by Transmeta for their TransMuted(tm) line of
processors.

In an unrelated announcement, spokesperson Deminz
stated that Lenovo’s VP of Remote Systems Control
Division, Ling Suey, was terminated today. No reason was
given and messages left for Suey were not returned.

Have a Great Weekend, Everyone – Aloha!

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One response to “Loof Lirpa Lerts

  1. Apple switching to AMD is surely an April-fools-day-joke, everyone knows they are following Dell and switch to the IBM Cell processors soon. …